Whew....life has been moving quickly lately. Mom is settled into her nursing home, none too happy, but knows its the best place for her to be (at the moment). My feelings are mixed here - on the one hand, there is a huge weight lifted from my shoulders - no second guessing on parenting (from the woman who would have NEVER won the Donna Reed award - more likely the Joan Crawford award), I get to deal with my teens on MY terms. I don't have someone who, though I do love her very much just sucked the life out of me, demanding my attention every spare moment I have. It's a freedom that I enjoy, though I wish she were more comfortable. She's at the end of her life and she knows it and is choosing to be miserable about it.
Other news....I attended a reunion this weekend. It was a reunion of old friends and associates that worked for a research/advisory firm. We met up in NYC at an Irish bar on the Upper East Side. Apart from terrible weather on Saturday, it was a wonderful, much needed weekend. I spent the weekend with close friends, one especially close friend. I don't talk about him much because much of our relationship is undefined or defies definition, but he has a good chunk of my heart. One day, we'll get our acts together as our other commitments to job, kids and the like shift - but right now, we're both thankful for the time we get to spend together. We spent a rainy Saturday strolling, doing silly touristy stuff like visit Zabar's and the Met. Over drinks at the Plaza, we chuckled over silly things and smiled. He was a very good doobie, I threw him into the mix of these old friends and he more than held his own.. these are friends that can pick up after not seeing each other for months or years without missing a beat. We speak our own language, laugh uproariously at shared jokes and experiences, and wish for those that aren't present, knowing they are firmly planted in our hearts. It was pure joy.
I headed home Sunday to be nominated for VP of our club's golf association (why? I don't know other than I am tired of the junk that is going on), visited Mom and crashed. I need a weekend from my weekend.
4 comments:
It sounds as if you had some quality time with some very close friends, I think it's wonderful. NY sounds great!
All the reunions sound great. I'll be home in a few days and we can catch up.
Please let you Mom know that we are thinking about her.
I'm glad to hear that you had such a wonderful weekend. I'm glad your mom is in a safe place, I hope she adopts a more positive outlook to enjoy things. I hope your week is relaxing so you can have an informal little weekend for your weekend.
Rest, recharge, and don't let guilt creep in. Taking care of aging parents is something that many of us will face and there is no perfect way. Your mom is in a safe place. Whether she's happy or not is pretty much up to her.
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